No Room for Toxicity

They change and they grow. Sometimes they crash and they burn. We never know how things will look when we learn of each other’s less adorable habits and the real personality of your other half starts to show publicly, or under the influence of alcohol or in-laws.

Toxic relationships has the potential to create a lot of havoc to people, families and workplaces. It contaminates your self-esteem, your happiness and the way you see yourself and the world. Toxic individuals question your self-worth as well as your sanity and even make you question the very essence that is your existence. No one is immune to toxicity and even strong, healthy, independent people can find themselves in the white-knuckled grip of a toxic relationship.

In QiMen, casting for relationship issues can be rather interesting. In a cast chart, a potential toxic relationship can be observed when you have a Black Tortoise or a Surging Snake sitting either with the Geng or Yi stem. A Geng stem represents a possible male toxicity while the Yi stem denotes a female toxic presence.

What do you do when faced being in a potential toxic relationship. In the face of repeated hurts and insensitivity, sometimes the best course of action may be to move on. If you want out of your toxic relationship, follow these three steps:

Know your value

Feel good about who you are, how you have grown, and what you offer in your personal and professional relationships. Jean realized that knowing her value meant putting her emotional health first.

Get a support system

Find positive friends and family or groups who can support you, consider reaching out for professional help. A therapist not only can help you identify a toxic relationship in the first place, but can also help guide you safely out of the relationship.

Stop all contact

If you really want out, then contact with your about-to-be ex needs to be very tightly managed. You remind yourself they are toxic and that you broke for a reason. Delete everything about your toxic partner. Then start getting busy. Go out and walk, run or jog. Tell yourself it’s your time and the next one will be better.

Remember that leaving a toxic relationship doesn’t mean that your life is over. Taking back control begins with you. Seeking help from your loved ones can help you get back on your feet. You don’t have to go through this alone.

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